This web page is dedicated to those who remind us
that we are human and we do make mistakes.

Sometimes the funniest things in life are not those we make up but those that happen to us. We say things, write things and do things that we think are correct but somehow they come out different. Sometimes it's embarrassing for us and surprising for others, but often it's too funny to be forgotten. Here is my collection of Life's Bloopers.


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Accident Reports
A pedestrian hit me and went under my car.

Ad Typos
Wanted. Widower with school-age children requires person to assume general housekeeping duties. Must be capable of contributing to growth of family.

The Bible According to Kids
Moses led the Hebrews to the Red Sea, where they made unleavened bread, which is bread made without any ingredients.

Church Bulletins
Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on Oct. 24 in the church. So ends a friendship that began in school days.

Courtroom Bloopers
Q: What is your relationship with the plaintiff?
A: She is my daughter.
Q: Was she your daughter on February 13, 1979?

English Misuse in Signs
In a Tokyo bar: "Special cocktails for the ladies with nuts."

Family Feud
Q: Name something you wear on the beach.
A: A deckchair.

Foreign Brands
Mucos (soft drink, Japan)

Instruction Labels
On a Korean kitchen knife: "Warning keep out of children."

Newspaper Headlines
Soviet Virgin Lands Short of Goal Again

On the Beat
"There are multiple copies here. You need to press down firmly when signing at the bottom of the ticket."

School Excuse Notes
Please excuse Harriet for missing school yesterday. We forgot to get the Sunday paper off the porch, and when we found it Monday we thought it was Sunday.

Things Kids Say
(Regarding what do most people do on a date?)
"Dates are for having fun, and people should use them to get to know each other. Even boys have something to say if you listen long enough."  - Lynnette, age 8

Welfare Requests
You have my changed little boy to a girl, will this make any difference?

What the Doctors Wrote
By the time he was admitted, his rapid heart had stopped, and he was feeling better.

Young Scientists
One hydrogin martini, hold the water.


 
Life's Bloopers was last updated on 2010 March 12