that we are human and we do make mistakes.
Sometimes the funniest things in life are not those we make up but those that happen to us. We say things, write things and do things that we think are correct but somehow they come out different. Sometimes it's embarrassing for us and surprising for others, but often it's too funny to be forgotten. Here is my collection of Life's Bloopers.
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Accident Reports Our bikinis are exciting. They are simply the tops.The Bible According to Kids Solomon, one of David's sons, has 300 wives and 700 porcupines.Church Bulletins Hymn 43: "Great God, what do I see here?" Preacher: The Rev. Horace Blodgett Hymn 47: "Hark! an awful voice is sounding"Courtroom Bloopers Q: Trooper, when you stopped the defendant, were your red and blue lights flashing? A: Yes. Q: Did the defendant say anything when she got out of her car? A: Yes, sir. Q: What did she say? A: "What disco am I at?"English Misuse in Signs In a Tokyo Hotel: "Is forbidden to steal hotel towels please. If you are not a person to do such a thing is please not to read notis."Family Feud Q: Name something with a hole in it. A: Window.Foreign Brands Polio (detergent, Czechoslovakia)Instruction Labels On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap."Newspaper Headlines Prostitutes Appeal to PopeOn the Beat "Law enforcement is not a spectator sport."School Excuse Notes Please excuse my son's tardiness. I forgot to wake him and didn't find him till I started making the beds.Things Kids Say (Regarding is it better to be single or married?) "It's better for girls to be single but not for boys. Boys need someone to clean up after them." Please find for certain if my husband is dead. The man I am now living with can't do anything until he knows.What the Doctors Wrote On the second day the knee was better and on the third day it had completely disappeared.Young Scientists Most books say the sun is a star. But it still knows how to change back into the sun in the daytime. |